After that post last July, I vaguely remember knitting a lot of stuffed critters. It was also during this time that I met my now best friend. Youtube is a funny place, no? lol Anyway, I started another ill-fated semester of college... Only to have my father pass away late September. After that, I'd had enough, and dropped all of my classes. My body wasn't coping well with all the stress I'd been through the last few years, and I was told by at least four different people that I should just take a break.
So I stayed home most of the time, trying in vain to figure out what I was going to do until the next fall semester. I didn't come up with much, but my mom had some good ideas... Most of them involved locking myself in my room while she vented her frustrations about life. She hasn't quite been the same since the incident in 2010, but at least she's still here, right?
We did get a new kitten in November. We named her Aja- she's adorable, and I promise I'll be better about getting pictures and videos up.
I made it through the rest of 2011 without too much trouble- at least I can't remember anything truly horrible... Ah, right. I started writing a series of letters to no one in particular. "Sombody." It helps vent some troubles and thoughts when I can't get to my laptop, or if I just feel like using the old fashioned pen and paper.
We made it into 2012 mostly intact. It was a pretty silent beginning of the year- something I was grateful for. Naturally, it was just the calm before the storm. Back in 2011, I think, I had decided to go on a trip to Ireland and Scotland with a study tour group. By March, I was seriously considering missing the plane home. I'm not sure what happened with my mom, but the house became pretty unbearable- it felt like I was walking on eggshells every time I set foot outside my room. Finally, I made it overseas, and I have some pretty funny letters from each place. I also discovered- somewhere along a seven hour plane ride across the ocean, mind you- that I have motion sickness. *shudder* Worst seven hours of the trip. I was lucky though- managed to hunt down some Dramamine for the ride home. lol That stuff is a life saver.
I made it home from overseas in one piece, feeling better than ever, aside from those weird heart problems that I'd started having last year. We're still trying to figure out what that's all about, but I did receive the good news that my depression has subsided into levels that can be managed without an antidepressant. In other words: I BEAT IT! *cheers* It only took me 11 years. But hey, some people never beat it, so I'll count myself lucky and say it's awesome. Really though, I feel better than I have in YEARS, even though it's ninety something degrees outside and we STILL don't have AC. lol... The only damper on all this is... My mother.
I'm not sure about anyone else, but when I make a promise, I do so with the intentions of keeping it. Evidently my mother does not. When she says the words "I promise," I automatically assume that it's simply not going to happen. I feel like I can't rely on her for anything- she changes her mind more times than Katy Perry changes hair colors. She's a lot more prone to anger than she ever used to be, and I'm finding that I don't deal with it all that well. She never used to be like this- it was always my dad who had the explosive temper. It's weird coming from her, and I'm starting to get really concerned. When things start getting thrown at you, you start to not want to live with the person throwing stuff. And moving out really isn't an option right now.
Still, I'm trying my best to dig myself out of this whole I find myself in. I'm taking a two year degree program through an online university, with the intentions of teaching clarinet lessons at the same time. Unfortunately, my mom's DEAD SET on moving out to Nevada sometime this year. I have no idea how we're going to do that, mind you, since we are currently living month to month on dad's pension. *sigh* I don't think she's thinking this through very well. Or at all. I guess we'll have to see how things go.
At this point in time I'm waiting for something interesting to happen... I will inevitably be disappointed, since this is Bay City. But next week is the fireworks festival, so I should have something interesting then. ^^ I think that's everything noteworthy between then and now... Which is kinda sad since I can fit it into so few paragraphs. Working on a knitted bag- I'll be brining it up with me when we go up to Traverse City in November. It's big enough to bring a few projects, but still easier to carry than my usual bag. The less crap I have to carry around, the better.
Is it sad that I'm already excited for Christmas? lol It's nice to be able to have a friend or two that I can give things to outside the family. It really brightens things up, especially if they're things that I can make. There's something about putting all that work and thought into something, and then giving it away to someone else. It's way more satisfying than if I'd knitted something for myself. But, anyway, I should see if I can't get going on it again- been in a weird funk lately. My brain is a traitor, thinking about things and people I SPECIFICALLY don't want to think about. >.< Grrr. If anyone happens to know the location of a certain cherub, please tell me so I can strangle the little bugger, kay?
Ciao,
Lynx
(Yep. That's how I'll be signing things now. The nickname's kinda rubbed off on me, and upon further contemplation, it's pretty fitting. ^^)
"Writing is like prostitution. First you do it for love, then for a few close friends, and finally... For money."
-Moliere
